Christmas

For the sake of not having my kids find out what they are getting for Christmas from me, I posted their gift on the "other" blog.

It took HOURS, and HOURS, and HOURS to do, but I am finally finished.

Originally I thought one busy book, for all 3 to share. Then, when I realized how stinking thick it would be, I had to break it up into 3. This might work in my favor....or it might not. We will see if the "sharing" skills are sharpened, or not through this gift....

Here are pictures if you want to check them out.....

B Line Blog

Nesting....

Ok.
So I went a little crazy there for awhile.
I nested.
Like I have never nested before.
The good news is that I am finally done....sorta.
The bad news is that my "fun savings account" is completely drained and I need to fill it again.

A glimpse into my insanity.....

The Bedroom Project:
The Hallway Project:

(Although it doesn't seem like much, I almost repainted the entire hallway after I patched up all the holes from where all the previous pictures were hung. I wish I was more patient and waited for my hubby to help me hang pictures. It would go a lot quicker, and require a lot less spackle, and touch up paint.)

The "Entryway Project": (it's in quote marks, cause its not really an entry way, just a glorified front door space....)

(The paint on the shelf is never going to dry. Once again, my lack of patience bit me in the butt on that one. 3 coats, in less than 3 hours on a cloudy day....I will never learn from my previous mistakes....)

The Living Room Project:
A "before" shot
And a few "after":


I was soooooooooo excited to work in this room. Our green couches were torn, but still functional, and I slip covered them to get whatever remaining life out of them that I could. Also, I scored a free ladder on Craigslist, painted it, found some wood in my dads barn (yes, you read that right, a barn) and had hubby cut it down to size for the shelves. I love my new cozy, comfy living room. Makes it so much easier to clean a room that you love to be in right????

The Kids/Hall Bathroom Project:



I scored a wall cabinet on clearance and painted our (previously painted white) bathroom cabinet to match. Got some spray paint, a new towel bar, and a new light from Walmart (which I wired and hung myself - thank you very much) , sewed a hooded towel for much anticipated #4, framed out the cheesy 1980's mirror with door casing, and checked that project off my list. Probably the two things that I was most excited about were this little nightlight/air freshener (why do kids bathrooms ALWAYS smell?) and this AMAZING toilet seat with a built in kids potty seat! What can I say, it's the little things that make me happy!!!!

Rich came home and commented that we now needed to paint the walls in the bathroom. Uhmmmmmm, seriously? Don't give me any ideas here, ok?

The "Dining Room" project (and again, its more of a glorified eating nook/computer desk space/place where the kids secretly feed the dog off their plates, but whatever):

A "before" shot. I didn't think to get any of the table and chairs, sorry.

A "midway" shot
An "all done" shot

The picture over the computer desk was a freebie from a garage sale! I love, love, love it! I don't know why. I don't think that it's something that I would normally choose, but for some reason, this one just makes me happy! I recovered the chairs, and scotch guarded them to no end. Since we constantly pull them into the living room for home team and small group, I needed them to tie into the living room as well. A super talented friend helped me out by going with me to choose some of the fabric and nail down what I wanted. (Thanks Kerri!)

The Kitchen Project:
A before shot of a super messy, yet everyday kitchen for me:

The "after" shots, with the help of hubby, and a little too much late-night caffeine induced work





Can you believe those handles are from Target? I have wanted handles on the cabinets for awhile, but have been too scared and money conscious to do it. I found these and we went for it! A few recovered bar stools, a new dry-erase chore chart to inspire my eldest to feed the do, some organizational bins for the kids' homework, and a little editing on my old tin collection, and the kitchen looks pretty spiffy.

And last but not least.....
The Baby Room Project:
This was really a matter of pulling out the bedding set that we have used 3 times before and making sure it was free of poop, spit-up, and booger stains. My "something new" for the room is the little pillow on the chair, and the crib is now ready for a little one to snuggle into with a cozy orange blanket and a nuggy of its very own.

And what did I do with all my sewing crap? Well, I moved it aside next to the crib, and am still furiously sewing until I have to put it away again. Sigh.


So, are you tired yet?
I am.

Investigation Never Pays Off...

So this morning I was starting to try to remember what I felt like before Maeve was born. I never keep journals, or record of what is going on in life, but I do blog, so I went back and read some of my previous posts.

When I came home from my doc appt on Monday, I was getting my hopes up because I thought that I had never dilated before my due date. Apparently I was wrong. Disappointment #1.

Then, I googled some pre-labor signs to see if I was having any. Not to be gross, but after she checked me on Monday, I had some (turn your head if you are weak in the stomach) bloody show - gag - and I didn't remember having that before. Well, according to the websites that I looked at bloody show indicates that labor is impending.....in hours, days, or weeks.
Are you kidding me? What kind of time frame is that? Hours, days or weeks? Whatever. Disappointment #2.

No contractions what-so-ever. Disappointment #3.

Getting uncomfortable. Disappointment #4.

My next appt is Tuesday, and I am really, really, really, really hoping to have progressed a bit. If not, I know - after reading my other posts - that it would be normal for me, and I can try to brace myself again for the long haul, and the likely hood that I will be induced. If induction is even in the option list, I think that I will go for it sooner than later. I am ready to jump into the next stage of this "mothering" thing. The baby part.....

38 Weeks

So, sadly enough, I have no pics of my baby belly at this point. Poor kid is already the least captured on film. I sense a trend for his/her life.

I had a doc appt today. All is well, and nothing is happening, as I assumed.

For the weak stomachs skip ahead to the next paragraph:
Cervix is anterior (good). Cervix is long (no surprise there) and she could get one fingertip on the baby's head, which means that it is slightly open, but that is normal after a few pregnancies apparently. This must also mean, I think, that I have lost my mucous plug? (Ew, gross, right?)

Doc gave me the standard list of things to do to get things going. Walking, "lovemaking" (gotta laugh at that word....especially when it comes from a sweet grey haired lady who might have just blushed when she said it), and some herbal ideas. I think I will just go sit on the couch, and drink some coffee and hope that my body will know what to do, and when to do it.

I also got my flu shot and DTAP. Both of which were painless upon recieval, and are now making my arms sore. Nice. I have encouraged my immediate family to get both as well, because this little one will be born smack dab in the middle of cold and flu season, and will have no protection from all those nasty little bugs that will inevitably come home with siblings from school, preschool, and church Sunday school classes.

For now we are playing the waiting game. I have set the date of 4 weeks in my mind so that I will not spiral down into depression when my due date comes and goes, but like every other pregnancy (and every other pregnant woman I know) I have an insane glimmer of false hope that I will deliver on my due date..... Why do I do this to myself? Shouldn't I have learned my lesson yet?

Every night, as I fall into bed (to toss and turn, and get up again to pee, and toss and turn, and get up again to pee) I try really, really hard to be grateful for another night of pregnancy..... Rich has started the daily (which will turn to hourly as time goes on) question of "Do you think it could be today?" My response -depending on my mood- will be either an eye roll, and a quick exit from the room, or tears. (I am sooooo emotionally stable at this point!)

I have yet to pack my hospital bag, get my "list" of phone numbers together, turn in my pre-admit info to the hospital, or clean out the baby's room. Why am I slacking? I have NO idea...just haven't done it yet. I am thinking that I will save it for when I go into labor....maybe it will give me something to do...if that day ever comes.

*Sigh*

Laughter

I feel like since I am nearing the end of this lllllllllllllooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnngggggg pregnancy, things have lightened up in my spirit. We received good news from our last ultrasound (even though baby had its hand covering its face the ENTIRE time). The doc took us into her office, closed the door (always a bad sign right?) and reviewed our old pics with us, and showed us why she wasn't concerned. Baby has a perfectly formed upper lip, and although no pics of the palate were able to be taken, she is under the impression that there is nothing we need to worry about.
I think that Rich still has some doubt, but I literally feel like a weight was lifted off my chest. The ultrasound took an hour, and the highly trained tech was intensely focused on the screen doing lots and lots of measurements. At the end (after I had literally sweat through my clothing) she assured us that baby looked fine. Do they train these people to freak you out so that the relief of their words feels even better?
Anyways, I feel like its time to be joyful and really celebrate this little one's upcoming birth. I have had a few *slightly* more painful contractions in the last few days. I complained to Rich (yes, complained) that just these brief reminders bring back memories of how bad labor is. I have not ever forgotten, but I think I try to sugar coat it and make myself believe that maybe I was just "whimp-ish" last time, and this time will be easier......

On another note, Rich came out of our room the other night, and sat down with a huge sigh on the couch next to me. His following words made me not only choke on my tea, but sent me into a fit of giggles that lasted WAYYYY to long!
Rich (matter of factly): "If I wasn't sure that I was human, I would be a little worried that I was an elf".
Me (totally confused, but honestly not paying attention cause the TV was on, and my tea was REALLY tasty) :" What???!"
Rich: "Well, today all I ate was a few pancakes - which consisted of bananas, cocoa powder, coconut and various spices from the cupboard - then I got to work, ate a few doughnuts, had some cake, and cookies, and came home had marshmallows and ate about 8 brownies."
Me (laughing, cause now I know he is actually talking about Will Ferrel in the movie 'Elf'): "Do you feel like you are going to puke after all that crap?"
Rich: "Nope. Not really. That is why I think I could be an elf."

Ok, so this might not be as funny to anyone else, but to me it was HILARIOUS! The guy has a sugar tooth unmatched by any. I have seen him power through a 2lb box of Sees Candy like it was an Olympic Event. He has no self control when it comes to cookies, and I can pretty much send him over the edge with any sort of dessert. We are so completely opposite! He cringes at my use of salt, and I start to gag watching him eat so many cookies. Someday when his teeth all fall out, and he goes into a sugar induced coma it might not be so funny, but right now I just have to laugh!

10 Signs that I am 10 months Pregnant

1. All my shoelaces are tied on the inside of the foot because a) bending over is an impossibility and b) I can no longer see my feet.
2. I will glare at you and growl if you ask me how I am feeling.
3. The words dilation, effacement, and cervix are now common terms in many conversations.
4. Every time I laugh, sneeze, or cough, there is a 50/50 chance I will pee my pants.
5. Cleaning my house requires 8 hours, and many, many breaks. This is sad because we live in a very small house...
6. Getting up off of the floor is no longer reasonable. If I end up there, I will stay for a really, really, really long time.
7. The idea of birthing a 8+ lb baby no longer frightens me. I am longing for it to happen, and researching all sorts of methods to bring on labor is an almost daily task.
8. The most time consuming task in my day is peeing, and I am familiar with all bathrooms within a 15 mile radius of our house.
9. Meals consist of taking a few bites of food, taking a tums, and enviously watching the rest of my family devour their dinner.
10. I am winded from sitting here typing.

Only a few weeks left.....

Patience

Dear baby,
Just a quick little note to let you know how much you are already loved.
We are still waiting for a high tech ultrasound to assure us that our scare from this week is unwarranted, but in the meantime, Mommy and Daddy have been covered in prayer by our amazing friends and family. They are praying for us, but they are also praying for you! They don't even know you yet, like we do, and they are lifting you up and talking to Jesus about you. What a sweet, sweet feeling.
You are active and in, what seems to be, constant motion in my belly, and when you push against my ribs, or stretch out into what used to be my liver, I thank God that you are here, and making yourself very known. Then, I give a gentle little push back, and try not get irritated. Daddy says that you are the most active one we have had, and I agree with that! You are definitely the strongest, and your kicks sometimes knock the wind from me, and make me stop in my tracks. I have felt you move since 15 weeks, and its been constant ever since.
We are all getting excited to meet you. Your brother cried the other day when he realized that you might possibly be a girl, but don't take it personally, he just wants another kid who can play cars and make the cool noises that he can. Your sisters will cuddle you and love you to no end, regardless of whether you are a boy or girl, and sometimes I wonder if I will get any time with you at all...
We are about 3 weeks from my due date, so if you could try your best to come then, I would appreciate it. I am tired of being pregnant at this point, and want to see your face. I want to know what you look like, what you smell like, and watch you when you sleep. I want to cuddle with you while nursing, and listen to you breathe next to me. Daddy wants me to stop complaining about all the pregnancy issues that I am having, so he would like you to come soon too.
I am asking one thing of you though, little one. Please, please, please, do not come on my birthday. You will find out soon enough that I don't like to share that day....

Love you to the moon and back!
Mommy

A little bit of News

So, yesterday I went in for a "no worries" ultrasound. With every pregnancy I seem to measure small, and my docs always freak out a bit, so I usually get a few extra sneak peaks at baby before the births. (I joke that I hide my uterus in my butt, because my kids always seem to come out healthy, plump, and never under 8 lbs.) The extra ultrasounds are always welcome because its fun to see the baby all scrunched in there, and know that all is well.
Yesterdays' ultrasound went well too. Rich and I left there feeling confident that baby was fine, and even more looking forward to the day that we will hold him/her.
As we were sitting outside eating dinner, the phone rang and someone left a r-e-a-l-l-y long message on the machine. I came in a few minutes later, and found out it was my midwife calling to discuss some strange findings from the ultrasound. She said genetics would call me in the morning and wanted to talk to me first, so that a stranger wouldn't break the news that something might be wrong with baby.
I had to really lean on the counter for a few minutes. After that became uncomfortable, I found a chair to sit in, and called her back. Long story short, the "findings" could be completely wrong, but there is a possibility that little one has a cleft lip and palate. Nothing life threatening, but a wrench in my plans for sure. In order to rule this out, or confirm, we will have to do a follow up ultrasound (most likely in the city) and meet with a team of perinatal specialists to go over the details.
Best case scenario is that this is just a fluke. That there was a shadow, or the picture wasn't as clear as it could be. The midwife, and doc who reviewed the ultrasound both noted that there was no sign of this on our first ultrasound at 18 weeks. If there was a problem, it would have definitely been there. When I heard this, I went racing back to my stash of ultrasound pics searching for a face shot of baby. I have one. Full face. I am no tech, but I see nothing wrong with it.
If a cleft lip and palate is the case, feedings will be difficult, weight gain for baby will be closely monitored (as in daily appts for weight gain) and there will be a series of surgeries to fix the problem. Nursing will most likely be out of the question, because getting a good latch won't be possible. I am weeping as I write this. I am weeping not only for my own selfish reason of not being able to nurse my baby, but also the fact that this little one will endure pain and suffering to fix the problem.
So, today I wait. I put on my "brave" face for the 3 little ones who look to me for strength and support. I can't stop the tears from leaking out of my eyes, but when the urge to sob comes I leave the room, and lock myself in the bathroom and pray. I pray for peace. I pray for an answer, and quickly. I pray that this baby is perfectly and wonderfully made, and that all this is a fluke, a shadow, or some other random happening. I pray for sleep in the interim.
In all my prayers though, I am trying to be so incredibly thankful. I am thankful for my husband who is strong, who is the leader of my house, who let me cry and leave snot all over his shoulder last night after the phone call. I am thankful for the knowledge that my friends and family will come alongside of us in either situation and rejoice with us, or support us through what we will go through. I am thankful that the neighbor didn't see me dry heaving on the lawn after I got off the phone with the doctor. I am thankful for the family, and friends who have called or texted and prayed with me. I am thankful for the experience to carry this last little one, perfect little face or not.
And now, I will excuse myself to go to my bathroom, and cry a bit more. I will then dry my eyes, and make myself presentable to the outside world. Eyelash curlers and mascara are only going to do so much good today....
I will update soon.

5 More Weeks...

...but who is counting? (I know, it will be more like 7, but there is always the optimistic side of me...)

I can't wait until I get to meet this little one at last! I can't wait until I start to feel all the pains of labor, and know that it is finally coming to an end! I can't wait until they say, "It's a ......" and I know that I have 2 sons, or 3 daughters....

I can't wait to see how big or little this one is. I can't wait to sit and stare at the tiny face, the little eyes, the squishy cheeks, and find all those weird things that each of my children seem to come with - dimples, birthmarks, curled over toes.

I can't wait to smell the little ones milky breath, to watch it twitch while it sleeps, and smile and remember what it felt like to have that happen inside me.

I can't wait to hand the baby to Rich, and watch him meet his son/daughter face to face for the first time....

I can't wait to be done. I can't wait to be done. I can't wait to be done!!!!